Well, what else can i say ?
All this is just the past. Its the end, and this blog is dying soon.
Meet me up at my new blog (:
A new life and the past is gone :D

www.jus-theupsandown.blogspot.com

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Lately I've been hard to reach, I've been too long on my own
Everybody has a private world, where they can be alone
Are you calling me? Are you trying to get through?
Are you reaching out for me? I'm reaching out for you

I'm just so fucking depressed, I just can't seem to get out this slump
If I could just get over this hump, but I need something to pull me out this dump
I took my bruises, took my lumps, fell down and I got right back up
But I need that spark to get psyched back up, in order for me to pick the logic back up
I don't know how or why or when, I ended up in this position I'm in
I'm starting to feel distant again, so I decided just to pick this pen
Up and try to make an attempt to vent, but I just can't admit, or come to grips

And I know some shit's so hard to swallow, but I just can't sit back and wallow
In my own sorrow, but I know one fact: I'll be one tough act to follow
Here today, gone tomorrow, but you'd have to walk a thousand miles...
In my shoes, just to see, what it's like, to be me
I'll be you, let's trade shoes, just to see what it'd be like to
Feel your pain, you feel mine, go inside each others' minds
Just to see, what we'd find, look at shit through each others' eyes

I think I'm starting to lose my sense of humor, everything's so tense and gloom
I'm not looking for extra attention, I just wanna blend in with the rest of the room
I just hide behind the tears of a clown
So why don't you all sit down, listen to the tale I'm about to tell
Nobody asked for life to deal us, with these bullshit hands we're dealt
We gotta take these cards ourselves, and flip them, don't expect no help
Now I could of either, just sat on my ass and pissed and moaned
Or take this situation in which I'm placed in, and get up and get my own

I can't describe how I feel right now. Maybe what's up there would help.
I want to be a better person, thats all.

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Its my 420 posts (: Okay, Qeen bangge .

I'm back from lepak-ing. Everyday lepak. Haiyoh, naek mendak sioo. Actually, I had no plans for today. Well, I woke up late coz no one disturbed me (: Went out and watched 2 movies straight. I start bathing at 3pm. I think if Khabir & Leena didn't want to come I won't bathe till evening. Haha. After bathing and whatever, went out and hang out at 543. Three of us were being so crazy sakk. Had a fun time at that moment (:

After which, me & Leena went to Leena's house. Read a book titled Only Mine, forgot who's the author. But its a nice story though. Then, played the computer for awhile till Mami's home. Leena told Mami about my pitiful leg and she gave me a wonderful massage! Sedap sakk kaki kena urut. Haha. My leg isn't that itchy now but it is still itchy here and there.

Around 7.15pm, went to Inter and meet Santi. Miss her loads! We had LJS for dinner. Then went around to search for tempat lepak. Jauh sak kiter pergi. Haha, at last found the perfect placed. Talked, confessed, gossip and everything that girls do. Head home at 9.20pm. Done =.='

Ohh, last thing. I hate curry.

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Trip to ....



Singapore Flyer! :D

Its the day yoo :) Like finally, I had my feet to Singapore Flyer. Huahua :D It was a last minute plan okey, friends? So, sorry if I didn't invite you all because it is really a last minute thing! Nevermind, there's always another day. So letme tell ya what happened today.

Khabir woke me up. Cb, I wanna longer sleep time siol but then kena kacau :( After he called, went back to sleep even though Mum was screaming her lungs out so I'm awake and get my sexy body of the bed. Phone rang the tone Sexy Bitch by Akon and that means I had a message. Another disturbance. Alermak, Astro Boy text me. Apologising that he fall asleep yesterday therefore didn't reply my message. See larh, Astro Boy can ahh like that ?

After his message, I decided that I should get up and get some bitex. Had breakfast and like usual, Jebat will be there disturbing me. Get a bath right after eating and after bathing, Khabir rang my house. Budak tuh kan, sekejapkejap call aku tao. He asked me out and I said okay. I thought of going Flyer because I watched the movie Sewa yesterday and they went Flyer. Plus, sister said there is a promotion.

Checked the internet and they said no promotions during school holidays. Saket hati :( But we still went out. When we're out, we talkedtalked and then Khabir called Singapore Flyer and they said that the promotions are still available! So, apalagik. We dragged our legs to there. Yeah, we walked okeyy! We were like tourists, you know. Because my aunt neighbour said that we can walk from Bugis. Its freaking far lahh! & we walked at places that we've never been too . Good thing, we were not lost.

Haha. After 40 mins, mind you, we reached! Such a relief siaa. We were so jakon when we reached there. Gags :D Took the Flyer and I feel so.... Bored. Because it was so slow and the sceneries were skysrappers and construction sites =.=' Sad right ? Snap a few pictures and then stone for the rest of the time. Haha. After that we walked around the place and camwhored. Awesome place for relaxing but I'm forbid to go anywhere new sea right now. So, we went home.

Ehh no. We went Esplanade and chill. Haha. And pictures wanna talk right now.











Thru think & thin. I love you.

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Hello humans :) Okay, definitely this is my second post of the day. Freaking bored right now despite the fact that many people are online and entertaining me. One of them is Ibrahim Icemint. Or should I call him Astro Boy ?

Well, this post is requested by Astro Boy to write about him. So here I am writing about Astro Boy which is wayy different from the original Astro Boy. Huuhuu :D nie budak, action jekk lebih! Step maner nyer Astro Boy tapi biler orang nak muntah, mintak bakul, punyer lahh lembab dher nak amekkan! Tak guna peh Astro.

I've known this boy since when I don't know, but in 2009 larh. Suddenly, dapat tao jadi Astro Boy ? My gawd. Menyampah. Abeh nak step ajar Qeen macam maner nak buat coffee pulak tuhh ?! Ehhh, boleh blajar sendiri lahh dehy. huahua :D Aku pulak step independent ehh ? Haha. I ain't that dumb to not stir coffee after putting milk okay ? -.-

Basically, Ibrahim is a nice guy with a strong spirit of believing he can achieve what he wanted. He's a good listener also. So, sesape adher problems, go to him. Email address : astroboy-takguna@hotmail.com If you want his number, ask personally. If I give out, later he scold :( What else ehh ? When studying, he will look very stress. He will have that 'can-i-squeeze-everything-inside-my-brain' kind of look. Huahua :D

Ohh congrats to him that was able to go Sec 4 next year. Study hard yoo! (: I'm smarter, hmph! Whatever orang kater ...! Gags :D Ohhh, he said that I'm so hott ! Like Megan Fox, ahh cann ? Haha xD muker wall siak. Okay lahh ending soon. Ibrahim is a nice, cute, funny, cool guy. At the same time, irritating, cruel, bad & mean. Cheyy, No lahh! One more thing, my mum wished to see him ? Whatever lahh ma .

He likes the colour blue and green.
And that is why he is so mean!

Huahua :D dahh out of idea. Otak blank, hangus. Byee!

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Ignore the previous post. I am feeling so scared at that time after what sister told me. Jyeah. And now, I don't know what happen but I am getting worse. Both of my eyes are swollen! :( my itches stretched right up to my arms and I am having bad headache. Fucked up. Pissed off.

I wanna cry lehh. Im suffering to the max. Ubat doctor pun tak jalan. Aper nak jadi nie ? I have to cancel today's plan because of this. I look hideous okay. I don't want to go out because of this shitx! Embarrassed. I'm afraid I have to cancel other plans because of this thing again :'(

Queen, please get well soon. I don't want to stay stucked inside the house, jackie! Asshole ahh this thing. Okay nothing much happened for the past few days so im ending here. Bye bitch.

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Song of the day : Meet Me Half Way

We are living in the 21st Century and things change a lot since the past few years. One of the things that is almost gone from a human's belief is supernatural. I am one of them. I don't believe in ghosts at the first place. Or anything that cannot be proven scientifically. Maybe I have never come across to experience such things. But since this thing that is happening to me since the past 1 week 2 days, im suffering and I'm starting to realise that such things still do happen in the modern urban cities.

I regret going Changi. Even though friends told me not to go there, I refused but still want to go. You know right, I'm kinda rebellious. I don't know if it is because of the 'things' that make me suffer or is it the mosquitoes. I've been facing awful itches all over my leg. Its hurting me a lot. Nothing works at all. I tried applying all kinds of oil but it still doesn't work.

Day and night, I will be bothering about my itches. I'm feeling so fucked up about this okay? It is now much more worse! It grows much more and it started to spread right up to my thigh. Furthermore, I'm becoming extreme lazy. Like I said again, things don't go right. I am different. I used to be the active one. I'm willing to sacrifice anything just as to get out of the house and spent time outside. But now, I rather stay at home and sleep. Oh, one more thing, when I was back from Changi, I fall sick 3 days later.

I really don't know if this thing is something supernatural or something. I am not trying to sound like some freak but it is really bothering me. I have awful looking legs right now and I totally hate it. Plus, I don't know why but I always have the urge to go Changi again. Its like I loved that place so much and I have to go there but no one wants to go with me. So, I ended up not going. I think I better not go. There may be something else that might happen.

Mum gonna bring me to the clinic tomorrow to check if it is because of my blood. Whatever. But she is still not confirmed yet because she keep on saying
" Kau takle tahan saket, tuh pasal."
Hello! The one suffering here is me not her. And the pain is killing me. It is much worse than the ulcers I am having. Whatever it is, I just hope it will go away soon.

I come there (Changi) in peace oke , tok ?
Don't mean to disturb you or what. Sory and please go away.

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When can I get moneyy ?! Someone please spare me $30, can ahh ?
Haha. Muker tembok siket .

Haluuuu (: I'm at Leena's house with Khabir and Leena's mum. Been here since 4 hours ago! xD Why so long ? Coz been watching Kekasihku Seru. So awesome man the filem! Its scary and the 4 awesome people are like concentrating on the show. Right now, there's an advertisement. So while waiting, I blogged something.

After this, 3 of us didn't know where to go. Erm, maybe going eating at Bedok Corner or just hang around at the block. Or maybe having Frolick! (: Now, Leena is applying lip gloss on my lips. Hah, tak penting ehh. I don't know what time the filem is starting back again. Waiting patiently nie.

Signing out, going out soon. Byebye :D

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Everything seems so wrong. Told you things are gonna change.
Day by day, its getting worse and boring. I don't know if its getting worse.
Maybe it only starts to get boring ? Many good things fall onto me during this weekend, so I cannot judge it and say it is bad/worse.

I pass my exams.
I get promoted to Sec 3 Express.
I got a new phone! (finally)
My mum giving me cash even though she is not suppose to.
Jebat starts to be much more manje with me.

Well, all of the above, are enough to make my life so happy for this year. But I don't know why I felt so lonely out of a sudden. I've got no one to turn to now. I have Khabir, the one and only bestforeverfriend. But sometimes, he just can't seem to understand what I am facing. I don't want to share my problems to my other friends because I don't want to be a burden to them and I think they are tired of listening to my cries.

I don't know what is happening to me! I felt so lonely, my life is different from the one I used to have. Even though I was hurt last time, but still I don't feel so 'abandon' like now. Maybe I am missing him ? Noooo! I am not suppose to. Or is it because that I have no money and therefore, no money, no life ? Or is it because I miss shopping or going out as a group like my old gang used to have?

Whatever it is, life gotta move on because I only have 2 more years of hope in here. Some of you know what I mean. So, I have to enjoy manymany and make sure spent it wisely also. So as to not regretting my doings in the end. I'm ending it here and I wanna spent time with my babyboy ; JebatBabat :D

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Gooodd newwsss ! (: I received back my report book , and it was like "Finally!" . So, my prediction was right. I am promoted to Sec 3 Express next year despite some failures. I was like some freak siol when I received that blue book and looked at the results! xD I know I was exaggerating because Mr Gabriel gave me that what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-this-girl kind of look :/

Alright, so let me talk about today. Had Samba Music and I stoned during that programme. It only gets much more exciting when I played the 'drum' (whatever its called) with Fieyana, Azura, Nafi'aah and one more, I forgot who. But my fingers are breaking sakk! The worst thing, my eardrums are bursting and bleeding :'( The space was like so cramp and there's like 7 class in a room. Everyone has an instrument and it gets really chaotic and causes noise pollution!

Recess was suckish because my class gotta do a survey first. So, we only have a short recess but was allowed to go back to the library later than the others. After samba-ing, we had movie screening. Guess what? It was HSM3! Wow, how boring right? *sarcastic smile* I dozed off in the AVA Theatre zzz.

Left the theatre at 1pm because of Drama. Performed for the East Coast Primary students continuously 5 times. Tiring but fuun! Especially the last one. Zach gotta leave early and therefore, Terrence was his replacement even though he has another role. The stupid thing, Terrence didn't know Zach's line! So, the whole skit was screwed up but it was damn funny, I swear. Know why?

Terrence(father) : Wake up! Wake up!
MinJin(daughter) : What is it Dad? What?!
Terrence : Where's all the money I gave it to you ?! Its not for the school right?!
MinJin : What are you talking about, Dad ?!
Terrence : You smoked right? Who teach you how to smoke? Is it your physic teacher?!

Physic Teacher ?! Cool or what, a physic teacher teach students how to smoke ? All of us were like laughing our ass out! Who is he thinking ? Mr Liew, the physic teacher ? Gawd!

Ohh, talking about Mr Liew, he cried just now. Unbelievable right? It is all because of Dayyah's story. It was very touching. Seriously. Dayyah herself cried infront of hundreds of students when she was sharing her story about her Dad that she once hated, during morning assembly for Values For Breakfast. I am so touched and was also shocked to see that she suddenly burst into tears! Don't be sad oke, darla ? Everything is fine now and what bygones be bygones (:

Okee, I am ending soon because to be frank, I've been putting a fake smile because I am mad about something. Syafika Darla and Azz know why (: sorry if I was like throwing all my anger to both of you when I told stories about her. But whatever, its her choice, her life and I got no more to say. For sure, one day, I'm gonna talk to her.

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